Great footy quotes

[LostDoggy]

http://blogs.news.com.au/heraldsun/faithworks/index.php/heraldsun/comments/famous_quotes_from_footballers

Just stumbled across this humorous list of footy quotes. Few chuckles there for those looking for something light.

My favourite (too perfect to be entirely accurate, I suspect, but still very good):

Ron Barassi to Gary 'Crazy Horse' Cowton: "What is it with you? Is it ignorance or is it apathy?"
Cowton's response: "I don't know and I don't care"

Groucho Marx would be proud.

[bornadog]

Laughed at this one:

“I never comment on umpires and I’m not going to break the habit of a lifetime for that prat.” (Terry Wallace)

[bornadog]

This one from World Game:

I spent 90% of my money on women and drink. The rest I wasted - George Best

[Twodogs]

My favourite footy quote is Alan Jeans's It's sooner than you think.

[bornadog]

“Sure there have been injuries and deaths in football - but none of them serious.” (Adrian Anderson)

[Mofra]

Michael Voss to Brett Voss lining up for goal:

"My dad F&^%ed your mum!"

He missed.

[Axe Man]

I dare say a lot of those are made up, or at least wrongly attributed as I have seen many of them before in relation to other sports.

[BornInDroopSt'54]

http://blogs.news.com.au/heraldsun/faithworks/index.php/heraldsun/comments/famous_quotes_from_footballers

Just stumbled across this humorous list of footy quotes. Few chuckles there for those looking for something light.

My favourite (too perfect to be entirely accurate, I suspect, but still very good):

Ron Barassi to Gary 'Crazy Horse' Cowton: "What is it with you? Is it ignorance or is it apathy?"
Cowton's response: "I don't know and I don't care"

Groucho Marx would be proud.

Not footy but I love the Groucho quote,
"Sincerity is the thing, if you can fake that you've got it made."
I learnt a lot about sociopaths and politicians from that.

[LostDoggy]

Not footy but I love the Groucho quote,
"Sincerity is the thing, if you can fake that you've got it made."
I learnt a lot about sociopaths and politicians from that.

My favourite Groucho quote is "I could never join a club that would accept somebody like me as a member."

I've been told that psychology students have written thesis' on that quote.

[Mofra]

Quite a lot of those quotes were actually US quotes, Vince Lombardi said a few of them.

"A game of three halves" is one of his classics

"We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees" is another

[ledge]

Jack Dyer had a few magic sayings

[Sedat]

Denis Pagan had some good quotes in his kit bag:

If your Aunty had whiskers she'd be your Uncle
If you look in the rear view mirror you're only going to hit the car in front of you
You can't go down to Puckle St and buy confidence from the shops
I don't want to hear about the labour pains, just show me the baby

[Greystache]

Can't go past Yogi Beara for mine.

- You can observe a lot of things just by watching

- No one goes there anymore, it's too crowded

- I always knew that record would stand until it was broken

- Half the lies they tell about me aren't true.

- It was impossible to get a conversation going, everyone was talking.

- It's important to go to people's funerals otherwise they won't go to yours

- If you come to a fork in the road take it.

[jeemak]

Denis Pagan had some good quotes in his kit bag:

If your Aunty had whiskers she'd be your Uncle
If you look in the rear view mirror you're only going to hit the car in front of you
You can't go down to Puckle St and buy confidence from the shops
I don't want to hear about the labour pains, just show me the baby

It's hard to see why having the best available talent at his disposal in one stint coaching at Norf, and then going to baseline rubbish at Carlton didn't pencil him in as the best ever with that gold.

If you consider that most famous people (well articulated coaches included) have about a one in ten success rate with the bullshit that spews from them........

[Remi Moses]

Jack Dyer had a few magic sayings

I won't say something, in case I say something
He throws his arms in the air like giant testicles .
There's millions of Dyerisms

[Remi Moses]

Denis Pagan had some good quotes in his kit bag:

If your Aunty had whiskers she'd be your Uncle
If you look in the rear view mirror you're only going to hit the car in front of you
You can't go down to Puckle St and buy confidence from the shops
I don't want to hear about the labour pains, just show me the baby

Don't piss down my back and tell me it's raining

[Twodogs]

Denis Pagan had some good quotes in his kit bag:

If your Aunty had whiskers she'd be your Uncle
If you look in the rear view mirror you're only going to hit the car in front of you
You can't go down to Puckle St and buy confidence from the shops
I don't want to hear about the labour pains, just show me the baby

Don't piss down my back and then tell me it's raining.

[BornInDroopSt'54]

My favourite Groucho quote is "I could never join a club that would accept somebody like me as a member."

I've been told that psychology students have written thesis' on that quote.

I feel the same way.

[BornInDroopSt'54]

Mark Twain

"Whisky's for drinking,

Water's for fighting over"

[BornInDroopSt'54]

Ted Whitten
"We stuck it up them"
Not much poetry but plenty of penetration in that comment.

[BornInDroopSt'54]

Twodogs:

"Exactly. We did all the hard work and they surfed in on our waves."

[bulldogtragic]

"It's got to be a do-or-die effort. It's got to be a determined effort. You've got to show me all the guts and determination you've got in your body. You've got to inspire me with this last quarter finish. You've been in front all day and you've got to stay there."

[AndrewP6]

Can't go past Yogi Beara for mine.

- You can observe a lot of things just by watching

- No one goes there anymore, it's too crowded

- I always knew that record would stand until it was broken

- Half the lies they tell about me aren't true.

- It was impossible to get a conversation going, everyone was talking.

- It's important to go to people's funerals otherwise they won't go to yours

- If you come to a fork in the road take it.

Yogi was fantastic...

"I never said half the things I said"
"If people don't want to come to the ballpark, how are you going to stop them?"
"Pair up in threes" (an old basketball coach of mine used that one)
"I'm not going to buy my kids an encyclopedia. Let them walk to school like I did"

[merantau]

Someone to David Shwartz: "I see Robbie Flower's written an autobiography."
DS: "What's it about?"

Jon Dorotich before a Tuesday night pre-season Cup game (games were usually played on Monday's)
TV interviewer: "How will the Blues go tonight?"
JD: "I guess it depends on how quick we adapt. We've never played under lights on a Tuesday."

[merantau]

Commentator: "Let me recapitulate back to what I said previously."


Jack Dyer: He always gets to where the ball ain't."

[GVGjr]

Commentator: "Let me recapitulate back to what I said previously."


Jack Dyer: He always gets to where the ball ain't."

Wasn't Dyers saying 'it's no good being where the ball aint'?

[merantau]

I think you're right. I was indulging in a bit of poetic licence.

South Melbourne play better in the rain than they do in the wet.
Bobby Skilton is one of the most amphibious footballers I've ever seen: he can kick with both feet.

[Bulldog4life]

Some memorable "Dyerisms"

August 24 2003

"I won't say anything in case I say something."

"Bartlett's older than he's ever been before." (1980).

"Johnston missed one from the 10 yard square - it was impossible to miss that." (1981).

"The only way to tackle Justin Madden. I don't know." (1981).

"Henshaw passes the ball to Kelly and Kelly gives a Henshaw to Glendinning." (1982).

"That's the beauty of being small - your hands are close to your feet." (1982).

"There weren't too many best mans on the ground." (1982).

"He's tuckled strongly by Tack." (1983).

"He sets himself for a high mark - actually, that was a low high mark." (1983).

"He's put the game beyond result." (1983).

"Bamblett made a great debut last week, and an even better one today." (1983).

"The ball goes to Marceesie ... Marcheson ... McKann, er ..." before co commentator Ian Major interjected: "Actually, Jack I don't think Marchesani was in that passage of play." (1981).

Dyer once observed a player was "carrying a bit of a knee" and noted that "They've got a couple of good players in Harvey".

And then there was "a rather difficult goal kicked very easily".

"Diamond Creek was a long way away once."

"Mark Lee's long arms reaching up like giant testicles."

"Flanagan's trying to use some pace that he hasn't got."

"They should have kicked 12 goals in that third quarter because they were right on top and hardly doing a thing right."

"The goal posts are moving so fast I can't keep up with the play."

And once, on the long-running Sunday television show World Of Sport, Dyer declared that Fitzroy had "copulated to the opposition".

http://www.theage.com.au/articles/2003/08/23/1061529383462.html

[strebla]

Another Dyerism Bosusto (I think that's correct spelling) he is not that good just an ordinary every day type champion!!!!!