Best sledges you have ever heard.

[ledge]

Not sure if it’s been done before but I caught this one today from triple M.
https://www.facebook.com/150807578273552/posts/2203485303005759/
Hopefully you can all see it.
What’s the favourites ones you have heard ?
Any sport.

[boydogs]

At least I'm the best player in my family > Mark Waugh

[Twodogs]

Glenn McGrath: How did you get so fat anyway?

Eddo Brandes: Because every time I *!*!*!*! your wife she gives me a biscuit.

[Twodogs]

Not so much a sledge but a great footy story. I met an old bloke one Friday night in a pub in Footscray and he told me about the one game he played for Fitzroy against Footscray. He gets Jack Collins as an opponent and while the ball was up the other end Jack says to this guy "hey the redhead over there is alright" he says "what rehead? I can't see a redhead" "in the green coat" says Jack "come on we'll go over and have a better look" so they both take a couple of steps closer and the guy says that he still can't see her very well and Jack says to take a couple of more steps closer. The guy says "is it her over the you are talking about Jack? Jack?" and points and turns around to see Jack 30 metres away running into the goal square with the ball!

[BornInDroopSt'54]

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=2324167104283940&id=637395922961075

[Flamethrower]

Comment from the crowd to umpire Ray Chamberlain....

"Hey Ray, you're the 2nd best umpire in the AFL"

After a brief pause...

"Everyone else is tied for 1st".

[Mofra]

Brett Voss lines up for goal.

Michael Voss yells out "My dad f--ked your mum!"

[SonofScray]

Not so much a sledge but a great footy story. I met an old bloke one Friday night in a pub in Footscray and he told me about the one game he played for Fitzroy against Footscray. He gets Jack Collins as an opponent and while the ball was up the other end Jack says to this guy "hey the redhead over there is alright" he says "what rehead? I can't see a redhead" "in the green coat" says Jack "come on we'll go over and have a better look" so they both take a couple of steps closer and the guy says that he still can't see her very well and Jack says to take a couple of more steps closer. The guy says "is it her over the you are talking about Jack? Jack?" and points and turns around to see Jack 30 metres away running into the goal square with the ball!

That's a great yarn. Thanks for sharing.

I was in my early teens when Dean Rioli shaped to Chris Grant, yelled out "Look out, he'll eat ya!" Which in retrospect might have been a bit racist but at the time I was chuffed I made a joke that on the surface was about Rioli being fat, but digging deeper referred to his favourite dish (reported as the result of his excessive weight heading into the season) being turtle.

[Murphy'sLore]

Why is Turtle called Turtle?

If it's too rude, don't tell me.

[Axe Man]

Why is Turtle called Turtle?

If it's too rude, don't tell me.

Dogs' humble champ (https://www.afl.com.au/news/2012-06-13/dogs-humble-champ)

EVERYONE you speak to about Chris Grant notes his quiet humility. They describe him as a quality person.

This was evident from the moment he joined Footscray before the 1990 season.

He was so quiet during his early years that his nickname was 'Turtle', because it was rare for him to come out of his shell.

[bornadog]

This one is slightly rude.

Dipierdomenico playing at the Whitten Oval chasing one of our players and grabs them by the shorts. The shorts get pulled down low, and a guy next to me yells out " Have a Dip dipper" :D

Well it was funny at the time.

[merantau]

My good neighbour who passed away a couple of years ago was a handy opening bowler up Wang way. Anyway, one game this bloke was carving him up no end and smirking as he did it. So John drops one short, the bloke goes for the hook again and cops it right in the gob - blood on the pitch, a tooth dislodged and he's down on his knees. John does the right, puts a consoling arm around him and says: "Don't worry mate. My wife's a dental nurse."

[Mofra]

Umpire Peter Cameron was out for months after being kicked by a horse at the MCG.

His comeback game was at Whitten Oval, so he's walking to the umpire's race just before 3/4 time in the reserves game, still in his tracksuit. Someone spots him and screams out "the horse should have finished you off Cameron!!!"

The crowd pissed themselves laughing.